Whether you’re a history buff, a scholar, or a history teacher looking to get some laughs out of your students, these 15 punny history shirts are a necessity. From Joan of Arc to the Titanic, subtle puns to outright jokes, you’ll make sure everyone knows how knowledgable you are with these funny tees.
A Roman Walks Into a Bar...
If you walked into a bar with this tee on, you’ll be sure to get a laugh out of any good ancient history fan. Let’s hope the bartender knows his Roman numerals.
Joan of Arc
Let’s face it: history did Joan of Arc pretty dirty. If you think she deserved way better, this shirt agrees. Dripping with sarcasm, you’ll make it clear everywhere you go that Joan of Arc was right, and everyone else was so disastrously wrong.
Don’t Make Me Repeat Myself
Those who do not study it are doomed to repeat it. And don’t make history itself remind you of that. This tee features a stacked image of ruins, brilliant architecture, and destruction topping it off. You’ll remind everyone that we must learn from and evaluate history’s mistakes, not brush over them.
Four Score and Seven Years Ago
“Four score and seven years ago,” Lincoln’s most iconic phrase spoken during the Gettysburg Address. With this tee on, you can remind those in your life with some truly outdated views that society has so moved on from that point in history. Let Abraham Lincoln assist your sass.
The Floor Is Lava
When Mount Vesuvius erupted, the floor was lava. Literally. Playing off the classic children’s game found in playgrounds everywhere, this shirt takes a crack at the destruction of Pompeii in 79 A.D. The lava may have cooled down now, but still: let’s be careful where we step.
History rocks. And these stones dressed up to represent groups and moments in history are here to remind you of that fact. Perfectly punny, this is the perfect gift to represent your inner historian or for the great history teacher in your life.
Ultimate Break-Up Letter
Break-ups happen. But none with so much style as when the settlers in the American Colonies denounced British rule and declared themselves an independent country. If American history is your jam, or you just really love historical documents, this is the perfect tee.
Here to Spill the Tea
The Sons of Liberty have arrived, and they’re about to make this piping hot tea run cold. The Boston Tea Party saw 342 chests of imported tea dumped into the Boston Harbor, and this act of government resistance made waves. They came, they saw, they spilled.
Never Forget Pluto
In 2006, Pluto was declared no longer a true planet, and it was the shock heard around the universe. With this shirt, make a tribute to the planet of old whose name we will never forget. The galaxy has never been the same.
For the buffiest history buff in your life, if you know someone whose knowledge of bench-pressing almost outweighs their knowledge of how the pyramids were built, this is a must-buy. Lugging around all those textbooks certainly builds strength.
What Are You Gonna Do, Stab Me?
This iconic “quote from man stabbed” may hit close to home for Julius Caesar. Stabbed 23 times on the Ides of March, this legendary Roman leader never saw it coming. Snag this tee that captures the essence of his hubris.
When Martin Luther nailed his 95 Theses to a church door and kicked off the Protestant Revolution, he had no idea how widespread the changes he called for would become. For any fan of history who really feels like they’re killing the game in life right now, this shirt will help you celebrate all the victories—big and small.
Only death could separate Henry VIII from his wife—er, wives. This former King of England is best known for the six wives he had over his lifetime, and the gruesome fates a few met at his hands. Two marriages annulled and two wives beheaded, death may not be such an issue in his relationships.
When the RMS Titanic set sail in April 1912, it should’ve been smooth sailing. Instead, the ocean liner hit an iceberg and sank only two hours after impact. But if you’ve ever stopped to consider how the iceberg felt about all that, this shirt will put things into a new perspective for you. Hey, we all get lonely sometimes.
Let’s be honest, we all have a favorite president. If your #1 is the #1, this George Washington T-shirt will proudly display your affection for the original American leader. Make it clear you’re his biggest fan.